Tag: self-care

When You’re Present You See SO MUCH More

This new moon in Aries is all about STOPPING AND PLANNING. You see the thing is if you’re so busy DOing and not BEing you’ll miss things. Take yesterday as an example, I went for a walk with my little Aragorn (superstar kid not biased at all) and he wanted to change direction. As I turned around I saw an amazing fluffy white feather and picked it up, told him it was from his angel and popped it in his pocket.

It either wasn’t there before or I didn’t notice as we were walking looking at the mountain.

And that’s about how life is. You have to stop long enough to allow yourself to SEE the options available to you.

So if you’re in a job which sucks your energy, working all the hours god sends, you’re not going to see a way out or other options as you’re not leaving ANY quiet space. And that’s really all being present is about – just stopping long enough to allow your brain to catch up with everything, to allow yourself the time to tune into your soul and you heart’s desires and to relax enough to see that there ARE other things you can do with your time and energy.

My weekly gathering online gives everyone the space to find time for themselves, even people who have said “I can’t I’ve got so much to do, I am so maxed out with work and crap I don’t have the time for me or anyone else I love…” attend one class then say “I HAVE TO MAKE TIME FOR THIS IT FUELS MY SOUL!” so join us. It’s an aweseom Sisterhood.

What to do when life feels overwhelming, how to cope, what to “do” and how to HEAL and stop overwhelm taking over your life.

I don’t shout about this but years ago I trained as a Flower Remedy practitioner for Bach and Alaskan essences. I have some absolutely favourites which I still go to over the years…and the top one for me is ELM. It lives in my kitchen cupboard by the coffee for the kids or those moments where I’ve let my own self-care slip…yep it happens.

You see, the elm remedy combats overwhelm.

Not only is the remedy ELM in the word, but the other clue to how overwhelm impacts on us is in the word itself… OVER… too much, more than we can cope with…

What is Overwhelm?

Ultimately it’s a fear that we are less than, not able to cope with our human responsibilities. FEAR.

It feels all consuming, (of course it does it’s trying to stop us doing more) there is too much on our plate, we can’t face it effectively, we end up getting lost in it, worrying rather than being. We are usually judging ourselves on some external constraints or expectations or years of conditioning.

Why Do we Get Overwhelmed SPECIFICALLY when we are about to do something new?

You know those old sayings “better the devil you know” and ‘don’t rock the boat”? Harmless enough sayings, but pretty deeply ingrained in us and rooted in our subconscious. Despite what it is you’re trying, that little naysayer in your brain goes “WOAH WOAH WOAH, hang on a minute, you want me to do MORE? nah I’m ok like this thanks. I don’t need to change, hey if I distract myself long enough then I won’t have to face this”

So, whenever we embark on something new for our self-care, there’s a part of us that feels overwhelmed because your soul knows you’re about to break some fairly old and deep rooted patterns, so it’s only natural that you’ll feel some resistance.

Perhaps you’ve been told it’s SELFISH to focus on you – WRONG! Self-care is not being selfish. It’s being self-aware. If your bucket is empty you can’t give to others. But you probably weren’t taught this growing up right? Remember, tow the line, don’t rock the boat? BS, you SHOULD rock the boat, and I mean RAWWWWWWKKKKK THE BOAT…but before you can get there, you need to feel comfortable on the water…and that starts with overcoming overwhelm.

How To Overcome Overwhelm

By understanding that resistance is normal whenever you’re trying to improve or change how you feel, then you can manage the overwhelm, we can start to move through it. 

If you’re here because you want to take more self-care time and are feeling this sense of overwhelm now, it’s OK, it’s your brain trying to claw back it’s familiar patterns. By learning how to manage your thoughts and emotions, you can combat overwhelm.

Not combat it a beat yourself up sense, but in a loving, let’s be proactive, I know you’re feeling scared and I’ve got your back sense.

You have to ask yourself certain questions to get your brain to consider how it reacts to the changes you want to put in place.

Over time, with this practice your lovely mind starts to embrace things more and not resist so much.

When you do this, you then find you’re not so overwhelmed and you automatically go into to curiosity mode, so your brain tries to help you to cope and look for ways to change its perspective without the fear aspect that creates overwhelm creeping in.

In my upcoming online course “Fear Free in ’23” Overwhelm is the very first thing we’ll be looking at and I take you through how to retrain your brain, lovingly, to help it feel less overwhelm. There are exercises throughout my From Fear Back To Love journal which forms the basis of this course to take you through the process of managing overwhelm, tackling it before it kicks in, with some awesome insights I’ve been taught over the years to bring the overwhelm back into perspective.

Is it time for you to join me and start your journey to get rid of fear, starting with overwhelm? I hope so.