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Why do you feel like you never succeed?

Do you feel like it’s hard to get to your dream and that you’re always chasing it? Never sure how you’ll ever succeed and get there.

The thing is dreams change as you achieve some things along the way.

You move your own goalposts unconsciously.

Simply what you want changes as you grow.

So what seems like an endless strive for perfection is actually what we are meant to do. Without it, there’s no growth.

Usually there comes a point of surrender to be nudged in a different direction for a bit, because we believe OUR way is the only way to get our dream, and that’s because we want it so badly.

This is why you sometimes hear people saying “this or something better” when they are doing manifesting work.

I have changed this slightly in my own work to be “whatever is right for my highest good”. I like this over “this or something better” because it’s telling the Angels, the Universe that I trust it’s got my back.

The other one is putting restrictions on it… it’s judging by your own standards what something better is. It’s not by the Universe’s standard. Which trust me, is much higher than yours and full of endless possibilities.

You may think you know what you need but it’s based on your own prejudices of what you believe you CAN have or achieve. Whereas by asking for whatever is for your highest good you’re telling the Universe that you’re genuinely open to change and possibilities.

So try changing this today and remove any limitations.

Instead “whatever is for my highest good”

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How do I get back the confidence I used to have?

Are you mourning the old you? Do you miss her? Do you wish you had her confidence? If you long to get your confidence back, here’s something you need to know about why that isn’t the right thing to try to do, and how you can make yourself feel better and move forward. It won’t be what you expect!

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Guided Meditation – Find Your Flock and Golden Egg Meditation to help you feel connected & combat feelings of lonliness

This gorgeous guided meditation is to help you feel connected to Source. To help you if you feel lonely, to combat feeling isolated. If you feel like you’re not sure where you fit in your life or with groups or your friends or family, this guided visualisation will help you to feel all the power of being a part of a flock- of having a connection to source, to the people around you that you can’t deny and which uplifts you. Come and fly with the geese, feel the power of their gaggle, find your golden egg and get what you need for YOU. With love, from Neen at BackToLove

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Understanding Different Communication styles

This is an excerpt from my journal around improving relationships. Whilst geared at adults you may find it interesting to see my understanding of the different communication styles and how we can use those when dealing with all children (all people) and the benefits of adapting how we talk and communicate with children with SEND are the same. We improve communication with them and their confidence levels will be higher if they feel they’ve been understood.

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How to stop feeling guilty

Recently I felt so guilty for something which happened in my family – if you don’t know it then it’s here.

I chose at that time to work through my journal and show you what happens when you tackle your guilt, with amazing exercises to put that bag of guilt down and a lovely guided visualisation that you can in fact build what you need from those bricks. Here’s my journaling notes from working through the guilt section recently. I hope it inspires those of you who are working through guilt and thanks for the private messages – you know who you are, it’s amazing to see you flourish.

I am so much more than this one tiny brick. I’d like to think I run out of bricks before I build my romantic castle because I want to release the guilt. I blipped, I made a mistake. I am not 100% responsible for what happened in my past. I was there but there are always 3 sides t o every story – theirs, mine and the truth. By allowing that thought in, I can accept that I am not evil, I am not a horrible person, a monster, scum.

I am me in all my rawness, all my vulnerabilities and with love at my core. I am amazing, I am whole, I am human and I am learning and trying hard.

I have been forgiven, I want to and I am forgiving myself. I am a lovely person and my intentions are good. I love you Neen and I forgive you ❤

THIS IS WHAT IT MEANS TO GET BACK TO LOVE. Join me on my live classes now!

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When a pet goes missing

I am an animal communicator – I can speak to and understand what animals have to say. 🐒

This is something that a lot of people don’t really understand, and I just wanted to take the opportunity to explain a couple of things that people who wish other people to talk to their pets on their behalf don’t really grasp very well. This is, however, not something that I choose to do commercially myself.

First is to note that like humans, animals have a wide variety of personalities and experience differing moods. 😁😒😔😊🤪

They don’t necessarily WANT to talk. 🤐

Social animals – i.e. those who have their own social structure, may be restricted by their own social norms as to whether they think it is right to talk to a complete stranger. Take Lions for example 🦁

Some animals may… well just not feel talkative. It happens to me often enough that I am not in the mood to talk! What about you?

Second is to note that animals have their own, often very different, perspective on things like their humans, their home, and the actions of humans.

One of our cats asked me why the neighbour obsessively cut her grass every day in the summer, considering it just dumb as the grass would grow back again. He understood my explanation that it was a form of territorial marking activity, but still thought it was dumb. People must often seem so to animals, just as many people also see animals as dumb. ☘️🐈

Third is perhaps more esoteric.

Animals generally speaking are not consciously particularly spiritually minded.

They understand life and death, but in my understanding of what they see and feel, the transition from “in body” to “out body” life is just part of existence, and not something they are particularly bothered about. 💀🐶👻

Don’t get me wrong, animals don’t want to die, but they are curiously indifferent to it as a process, and as they continue to perceive their surroundings when they have done with their bodies, they won’t necessarily respond in a way that we would expect. Asking an animal if it is still in its body is more likely (but not guaranteed) to get a clear answer than to ask if they are dead.

So, when animal communicators “speak” to animals it is an experience akin to communicating with an entirely alien species, 👽the logic, language, society and perceptions of which are completely different to our own.

Animals have wills of their own; they can be conditioned to be restricted to human social norms to a certain extent, but underneath is always that alien mind.

One of the most common requests people have of an animal communicator is to locate a lost or missing pet, more often than not a cat.

This is something which all of us pet-owners dread, the free-roaming littlest member of our family has disappeared, and we have no idea where they are, why they have gone, or if they are OK.

As a long-time cat owner myself, I fully understand how traumatic this can be.

Night after night we go out, 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♂️ walking the territory we believe they operate in, calling desperately in the hope that we hear that instantly recognisable sound of our cat. Often in vain. And a lot of the time, a few days later, our wonderful and amazing little furperson is then in the house, apparently utterly indifferent to the sadness, pain and stress we have been through.

For an animal communicator this is really hard.

We empathise with the owner, we want to help, and when we reach out to missing pets it is usually the case that we do get something back.

However it is not necessarily helpful for the owner, who really wants to know

(a) where their pet is, and

(b) if they are OK.

Cats are notoriously unreliable to communicate with.

If they are distracted (hunting, 🐈🐁for example) as predators they are so focussed they often don’t hear, or choose not to respond.

If they are hurt, they are often very stoic and don’t mention it or want to talk about it – especially if they feel silly for the way they have been hurt. Cats have a great sense of personal dignity…

So, returning to that little alien mind, it is important to remember that cats do not have the same perspective on the world that we do.

We can ask the missing pet what they can see – and they will answer with landmarks they use as points of reference, which often we do not notice.

Although visual hunters, smell and hearing are more important for a cat to know where they are. So whilst their description makes perfect sense to them, it is not necessarily one we will recognise or be able to interpret.

They also don’t see very well into the distance, which becomes blurry for them, as does the edges of their vision – again an adaption which works well for them as predators.

We can ask a cat when it is coming home – a question they aren’t usually able to answer – or if they are coming home soon. Often they will say yes to the latter one, but the concept of “soon” is something relative to each species, all of which experience the passage of time differently. Added to which, they may well be on the way home when they get distracted by something interesting and simply forget.

Cats can also roam fairly widely – even those who are stay at homers. Cats, particularly urban ones, generally don’t travel much more than a couple of hundred metres from their homes. Rural hunters can go much further, and studies of farm cats and those who have been let out too soon after moving house have shown they can travel several miles in a night, although this is unusual.

So, if you ask an animal communicator about your missing pet, please bear these facts in mind.

Your pet may not want to talk, may communicate its location and plans using points of reference alien to us, may change its mind on the spot about coming home and so on.

It may even lie or hide the truth. Any animal communicator wants to help owners whose pets are missing ,and will do their best to do so.

We can ask them to come home, but they have free will and may not listen. It doesn’t mean they don’t love you it just means they’re being CAT.

But it isn’t an exact science, and whilst it will reflect what the animal has told us at the time we communicate with them, things may change with the passage of time.

We can tell you what they give us but there’s no guarantee they’ll not change their mind. If they say they’re on their way home they may get distracted. They don’t see time the same way we do, and so for them they don’t feel the panic and the sense of loss when they’re out wandering because they’re SO PRESENT in what they’re doing.

I hope this helps readers to understand a bit better how animal communication works. Do ask me any questions you have and if you feel you want my help please book a reading with me now.

What is rejection and how to cope with it

Recently I’ve had a few experiences where I could say I’ve felt rejected.

And bugger me that’s a massive minefield of complex 💩 to unlock… look here’s what I mean… and yes I want to empower you but I want you to see what I went through… because I know when I share the truth of my processing of stuff, it helps most.

So what is rejection?

It’s feeling unloved, ❤️‍🩹 unimportant, less than… and is always based on some kind of relationship.

We say we feel rejected by someone…

We could be positive and say if we are truly confident then we can’t feel rejected because we know how awesome we are…

Ok… maybe a bit… but what about the sadness? The feeling that you get? 😔😢

If it’s not sadness and you truly think you’re 100% awesome then you’ll possibly be bloody angry instead. 🤬😤😡😖

I know I go all typical cancerian with my claws out when this happens. 🦀

Is it the realisation that you’re not thought of as highly as you hoped?

Does that – yeah let’s call it a realisation – make you feel like you can’t trust your own judgment?

Is it you’ve let yourself down in your own eyes? Been less than… done wrong? Feel like you’ve f*cked up?

Then, the other part of the Cancerian in me wants to hide in my shell 🐚 and sod the world… 🌍

Then you’ll tell friends 💬 to get them to validate your feelings of sadness, anger… projecting that stuff, amplifying it:

there then may even be guilt, and as a spiritual person 😇 you might feel like you’ve done wrong again and perpetuated the situation 🙈 but in reality you probably just feel like actually you were asking for a reality check by sharing it with other people.

And a confidence boost, reassurance that you’re worthy of the attention or love you deserve. 😘😍🥰💕

These people are your tribe: 🙌 they help you to feel strong and to feel like you’re loved.

They are your support network and help you navigate how to set boundaries so you don’t suffer rejection.

And it’s this kind of stuff that inspired me to create my journal Awareness, Boundaries and Confidence- 7 Steps to Better Relationships because I’ve done so much flipping navel gazing and got so much help and support from some amazing people that I wanted to share it with you. https://backtolove.life/product/awareness-boundaries-confidence/

Everyone is worthy of love. If you feel rejected it’s not you, I promise it’s not.

It’s circumstance.

It is the other person being in a bad place, and you never know why or what sh*t they’re going through and perhaps it’s a lack of connection that you may not be able to ever bridge.

Maybe you just don’t get each other.

But remember that tribe that DO know and support you. (And in my journals and groups I take you through how to build that).

But it’s not your fault.

Share this please because others need it.

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Why do I run groups? Sisterhood groups, confidence groups… because I’m selfish and I like how it makes me feel…well that and…

I know I can guide people on moving from WORRIER to WARRIOR through sharing my own experiences, as well as encouraging people to find their inner confidence.

I love connecting people.

I don’t want anyone to feel isolated in opening up and exploring their uniqueness.

Everyone has mental health. It’s just health of the mind. Sometimes we’re sick, sometimes we’re well, sometimes an element of us hurts (like a sore finger).

We need to end the stigma of asking for support. So join a group and accept it’s a given. The support is there for you.

In the past, I have struggled and felt alone and now I don’t. I know I add to the group I run, and they add to me more than they know. So you get to make me feel better too if you join.

I see the entire team thriving, but being honest about how they feel. I feel supported, loved and accepted for being me.

How cool is all of that?

Time for you to join me, pay every week at £6 or £24 for a month and watch it change your life.

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Why you should tell someone your dreams (and listen to theirs)

Normally you wait to get to know someone before you tell them your dreams, but recently on a course with the Moray Wellbeing Hub I was tasked with a peer exercise to tell someone my dreams, something I’ve always wanted to do and then to have them recall what I’d said and tell the rest of the group my dreams. I did the same with them. so what did I learn?

Well firstly, when you hear people share their dreams it reminds you that anything is possible.

You can see other people light up when they talk about their passions and you realise this is what you must do too when you talk about yours.  I felt excited for them, really seeing what they want to achieve and watching them light up is amazing, it makes you feel a part of something too, and trusted. 

So not only do THEY feel good, but you get the warm and fuzzy feelings too.

NOW TELL THEM YOUR DREAM and ask them to recount it for you.

What? why?

well, hearing other people talk about YOUR dreams and recount them to you makes them feel very tangible, achievable and real and in a peer to peer setting we could all see how actually, we’re already well on the way to living our dreams, because of the work we’re choosing to do. 

The natural response of anyone who is caring and into supporting others is to encourage others.

Let them see what you’re already doing because they may say “you’re already doing xyz towards that” and that feels absolutely flipping amazing.

Sharing your dreams ands doing this exercise enables us to share our experiences if we’ve been through it and managed to come out the other side to share our experiences and further encourage one another that it’s entirely possible. This empowers people further. So DO IT and TRY it.

It also puts in your order to the Universe – it cannot help you if it doesn’t know what you want…or at least vaguely where you want to go.

If you haven’t a clue where to start, join my BackToLove live group, we meet every Thursday and we will be covering this and SO many other amazing healing topics, and it’s such an amazing supportive group.

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